pilot

persistence is a whole different thing from insistence.

we still have commonalities, and im still stranded.

it still hurts when hope fails to say the words i needed to hear, to do things that pushed me to be what i am afraid to be, to be the inspiration that i have always relied on, and im still stranded.

it still bring pains when there are things in life that i take care of only to suffer and feel despair over others. i thought il get numb with its infiniteness… but the more i get closer to the heart id want the pieces back, the more i lose my own, although it gives me so much happiness, it brings so much anguish that my brokenness can never be cadeau’s wholeness. and soon, when it will finally find what can make itself whole, i will be stranded.

i must persist, but should be strong enough to humbly accept and not insist. whatever it is that may come, accept.

if all else fail, would you be there to love me? when all else fail, would you be brave to see right through me?

i will move on, time. it wont be long, i wont stay stranded.

and if dreams were wings… i would have flown to you.

worth the ride, the time, the stress, the heat, everything. no matter where you are.

boss is so generous. He gave me enough time to figure out things myself without taking the most precious possessions, He made realizations occur without tears shed.

Forgive. yes, i have. i never would want to be eaten up by remorse someday.

thank you for entrusting that "panget" na alaga to me. its funny how i can easily come up with a plan for the day with just a 2-word phrase sent in the middle of my precious sleep. its funny too, how i can become so sure and accurate of things. maybe, it was God’s way. in the short span of time, how can it become so real????

and there were the odds, but id get to live with it. i will get to live with it.

give me a chance to put back all the pieces.

God is always perfect with timing.

il love all of the hurt away.

mind at rest, nothing much to do. papers and notes are put into proper places where someday, when i look at them, i wish to look at them with much pride and happiness over what i have achieved through the years.

confusion kills. i never wanted to ask. but my heart keeps on doing so. every single day, question arises. i know the answers, but i find them hard to accept, impossible maybe. it should not be, it can never be.

i should have seen this coming, but pride was too much that i didnt had myself prepared for what i was afraid of.

i never wanted to make anyone feel blue.

there are so many things that i can do. 

tell me where it hurts.. and il do my best to make it better.

summer classes are over. finally, over.

3rd year na ko! haay.. saya… patay na.

read between the lines, cool actually.

and if you let me stay, il love all of the hurt away.

the life… the life i should have prepared for before immersing myself into it. of the consequences of single actions, of the untoward incidents that may happen, of the unexpected to come.

its glad to see something you have always worked for. you study, you search, you shoot and you weave.. and you would always want to make a difference but that would not always be the case. different eyes mean a lot of different perspectives and that i should always be reminded of, the ultimate goal, make them see what you see, and that would be your basis if you want to know if your on the right track or not.

in the years and beyond, i hope to keep the people i have with me right now.

especially the two people, Boss have entrusted me to look after to. yes, i am their angel. their ngarag-turned-hero angel. and that’s the best job i have ever had, so far.

dreams will be weaved… in the years and beyond.

for the perfect reasons, i find this friendship worth keeping.

we rarely see each other, though im quite sure we know each other well enough.

we never got the time to hang-out, but we get to understand each other’s own world and somehow, relate to it.

we might not have spend enough time, but each short moment that we get to spend together, are worth keeping, and are the kind that you’ll cherish forever.

the more we give to this friendship, the more we lose a part of ourselves, and the more we lose a part of us, the more we feel complete.

i have shared my piece and she does as well.

funny how our paths met, its extraordinary and so unexpected, but our souls connect and now were friends.

aside from the privileges that i get to have being her friend, what i love the most is that the more i get to know her, the more i realize how  lucky i am to have such a friend, whose heart is as beautiful as roses and mind, as sharp as razor.

my co-great mind, "great minds think alike" kala nyo ba?!

joys untold, are the happiest thoughts.

the most insignificant week, nothing special, and might as well, nothing real.

sometimes, we just smile and be glad that there are things that make us happy, those that once were real, and those that we wish we could turn into reality.

it inspires me to dream more, the thought that one day, il hold them, and it will be significant, it will be special, and most importantly, it will be real.

the problem lies not in how to achieve them but what to achieve. the problem lies not in how long it will take but how long will i dream of it.

id rather not write of it.

joys untold, are the happiest thoughts.